• PAGE ONE
• INDEX
• HOME

Old-young divide

B. S. Raghavan

GENERATION gap has acquired a new stridency because of the aggravation of certain tendencies characterising the psychologies of the old and young. Also, the stresses of the breakneck pace of life led by the young and old and the loosening of t he social ties because of growing geographical distances between members of families have created deepening fissures in human relationships. Everyone feels mentally and emotionally cramped, with no room or time for finer feelings, commo n courtesies and minimum consideration. Rank individualism bordering on egotism is rampant.

Two conspicuous features of the era of science and technology are responsible for the old-young divide assuming disturbing dimensions. The first is that children from a very young age are getting exposed to knowledge and information exploding around them through television, personal computers and video games. Even a three-year-old deftly manipulates knobs and controls and keyboards with supreme confidence.

They are also tending to be self-reliant and independent in a way unthinkable even ten years ago. The other day when the five-year-old son of a doctor was ignoring the latter's advice to avoid chocolates, I intervened and told the boy that since his fath er was a doctor, he had better follow his advice. The sibling shot back, ``He may be a doctor, but it does not mean he is right!'' When I asked my six-year-old granddaughter not to watch cartoons too long, she asked, ``Are you my boss to order me about?' ' In general the young of today have no patience with dos and don'ts, whereas the older generation had been brought up on nothing but do's and don'ts.

The second aspect of the divide is more serious in its implications. Even 20-30 years ago, the value systems, cultural influences and behavioural traits of the young and old were discernibly similar. Both were aware of the lofty treasure houses represent ed by the scriptures, the corpus of literature and lores and legends. Nowadays, the mindsets of the young and old are so far apart that there is no common meeting ground and the divide is becoming unbridgeable.

Meanwhile, the `sandwich generation' does not fit into either in terms of temperament or attitudes. They are the modern version of nomads or gypsies, a peculiar product of scattered families brought about by globalisation, having no country or culture or even a settled life of their own. Their parents are in nursing homes, they have only a fleeting married life, their children are either relegated to day-care or studying in far-flung schools/colleges visiting once or twice a year with no scope for susta ined emotional bonding, and their artificial lifestyles have robbed them of natural human warmth and fellow-feeling.

The worst part of the divide is the neglect of, and contempt for, the old. Dr S. Natarajan, who was the first to start a separate department of geriatrics in India and make the care of the elderly his mission, recently published a book documenting the cr uel instances of bashing of the elderly by their sons and daughters and other young members of their families. A recent survey of the American Association of Retired Persons reveals that less than 19 per cent of White Americans and 42 per cent of Asian A mericans care for the older members of their families. Here is a problem crying out for a solution.